But another media powerhouse - Howard Stern - took her to task back in December on his popular SiriusXM radio show. A fan of her Deadline: White House show on MSNBC, Stern complimented Wallace profusely but then went on to point out that she tends to use "sort of" as a vocal filler when she's on the air. And this critique wasn't in passing. Stern spent some time on it, although he did also insist that he admires her work and gives her show high marks. Wallace wasn't even a guest on Stern's show at the time - it was just Stern going on a seemingly impromptu rant.
What would you do if you were called out so publicly? But wait - most of us won't be. So ask yourself: what would you do if offered constructive feedback in private? Most of us would get defensive. Not Nicolle Wallace. She took to Twitter:
And you know what? She changed her ways. Her use of the vocal filler decreased dramatically. And Stern noticed and praised her on one of his later shows. Sometimes all it takes is for someone to point something out to us. And when it's couched in praise and admiration, it's often heard and heeded. You probably won't be headlining your own talk show on MSNBC anytime soon, but you can monitor your use of vocal fillers when speaking in public and even in private conversations.
Just today Stern commented that Wallace seems to be slipping back a bit into her "sort of" habit. Let's hope she was listening and will give her delivery just a little more attention.
But wait. Is this feedback ever really appropriate? And do women get called out on such things at rates higher than men? I'll discuss this in a later post. And I'll also share with you how you can better monitor your own use of unintended vocal fillers.
Ahhhh, vocal fillers. I have a story about this actually:
ReplyDeleteI had an independent business consultant over to my apartment to show me and a few friends some of the products she sells. As she was going through her presentation I began to pick up on the fact that she would add “too, as well” on to the end of almost all her sentences! It eventually got to the point that my roommate and I decided, after she had left, we wanted to find a new consultant as it became hard to listen to her because it was so constant. Now I am in no position to judge really because my use of “um” leaves something to be desired. But I really think that speaks to the idea that vocal fillers can lead your audience to stop paying attention to your message if used way too much!
My question is, would it have been appropriate for me to mention something? Was it appropriate, in your opinion, for Howard Stern to make his constructive criticism so public? When do you believe the right time to inform someone of their vocal fillers is?
I love your story! I think we can all relate to this. Once we notice something like this, it becomes really hard to NOT hear it!
ReplyDeleteI'm going to say that it's best not to comment on something like this UNLESS YOU ARE ASKED to comment or unless it is your job to comment on someone's public speaking performance.
I always suggest that constructive feedback is best given as an "I statement." So in your example, something like "I had a hard time paying attention to your message because I was distracted by your use of the 'too, as well' vocal filler." In addition, it always helps to couch constructive feedback in specific positive feedback.
As for your Howard Stern question...he's kind of in a league of his own. Making the comment was right in line with his style and worked within the context of his show, especially since he couched it with such genuine and effusive praise for her work.
The real winner in all this? Nicole Wallace. She took the feedback in stride, made improvements, and gained some publicity as well.
Thank you for your insight! I suppose my lack of knowledge when it comes to Howard Stern and his style put me in the wrong view point of what he did, so thank you for clarifying!
ReplyDeleteWow. How graceful did Nicole Wallace handle that situation? You're right, humans have a tendency to get defensive and aggressive at times when people make a constructive comment just as Howard Stern did. Howard Stern is known for his vulgar rhetoric. It's hard to receive constructive criticism. We don't want to hear what we could improve on, instead we want to get that instant gratification of a job well done. Verbal fillers are hard to get rid of. But maybe if someone points them out to you, it will be easier to correct. I know if someone were to publicly call out a mistake or fault of my own, I probably wouldn't take too kindly to it. But I absolutely want to handle it gracefully as Nicole Wallace did.
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